Greetings Wise, Wonderful Mid-Life Women!
Welcome to another episode of Sunday Peppys! Today’s topic is about “Unexpecteds”.
Truth be told, we all really would prefer to have life be manageable, mostly predictable and “surprises” fun, with just a wee bit of edge to them (oh, and controllable too, please).
But we’ve been around the block enough now as midlife women to know that life serves up things we simply weren’t expecting. Todays Sunday Peppy is about “Unexpecteds” and how we can relax into them and even find the gift they offer to us.
I’m not talking here about the fun unexpecteds that tickle and delight us. I’m talking about the unexpecteds that are scary, edgy or unnerving. The kind we may want to control, try to control but know we can’t control.
Mr. Kitty Fluffy Pants was a stray cat who unexpectedly came into our lives and walked deep straight, right into our hearts. I’ve never seen my husband so completely hijacked by an animal that quickly.
- Lots of questions around what this meant for us and what to do.
- Answer: Be in the Creative Flow of Life.
We took Fluffy in and tended him. Neutered, shots, dewormed, cockleburrs removed from his coat and blood-tested for Feline Leukemia. He tested positive and our hijacked hearts sank.
- Only one question. Now what?
- Answer: Be in the Creative Flow of Life. Follow Our Intuition.
We couldn’t expose our 10-month kitten Penny to Feline Leukemia so Fluffy lived in our 4-season porch, letting Penny and him find ways to play through the screen door. We kept tending him and building a relationship with him. Our hearts opened even wider as we got more attached to this amazing little, wise spirit-being. We had great expectations.
- More questions about how long we could keep doing this arrangement, what it meant for our lives, what to do next.
- Answer: Be in the Creative Flow of Life. Follow Our Intuition. Trust & Surrender.
It was subtle at first, hard to detect. Fluffy was changing. His BIG, galumphing energy was decreasing and his playfulness was slowing down. He purred less and less. Something was wrong. He had a fever and wasn’t feeling well.
I made an appointment with our vet for the next morning. I needed to fly out early that next day to facilitate a retreat, so David took him in. We were both thinking and hoping he just had some kind of simple, curable infection.
- Lots of questions, uncertainty and angst about how this will unfold.
- Answer: Be in the Creative Flow of Life. Follow Our Intuition. Trust & Surrender. Let Go of the Outcome.
David called me with the news. The blood test showed that he was in organ failure. Not curable. The vet said his decline would rapidly progress, becoming painful for him soon. It literally dropped me to my knees when I heard this. I had expected something less serious.
I’ve heard my husband cry before, but never sob. It shook me deeply. Only hours before I had hugged Fluffy goodbye and said: “I’ll see ya when I get back bud. I love you.”
Our hearts just broke. It was so unexpected. We knew the right and respectful decision was to let him go so we had him euthanized. David said even the vet cried. She could feel how big and wonder-filled his energy was. Fluffy got into her heart, too.
He’s buried in our front yard perennial garden with a metal cat memorial that David designed and made. It’s a beautiful place for a body to rest and rejoin the earth again.
Fluffy was a wonderful stand-alone gift. And he also gifted me with an experience to get outta my head trying to figure things out, to find the “right” answer and simply practice being present. Being in the Creative Flow of Life. Following My Intuition. Trusting & Surrendering. Letting Go of the Outcome.
It’s been almost a year since Fluffy died. We still miss that big, adorable boy. I did this Sunday Peppy interview with him shortly before his death. I’m so glad I did and so happy to share it with you.
Whatever “Unexpecteds” you have going on, I hope you find this helpful, hopeful, inspiring and soothing.
Until next time, take care and be kind to yourself!
A little more of the Fluffy story……you can’t make this shit up.
Not too long after Fluffy died I was driving back from the airport returning from another retreat-facilitating trip I’d been on and I got a very clear-as-a-bell picture in my minds eye of a white cat with a few dark spots and a clear directive to stop at this particular feed store on the way home.
Without a doubt, I knew it came from Fluffy. I stopped in and asked if they had any cats. They had other animals but, no cats. I didn’t think anymore about it.
A month later, again I was driving back home from the airport returning from yet another trip. Again, I got the very clear-as-a-bell picture in my minds eye of a white cat with a few dark spots and a clear directive to stop at this particular feed store on the way home.
Again I stopped at the store and asked if they had any cats. The saleswoman said they did. Four, 5-week old kittens had been dropped off a couple hours before. They’d been abandoned by their mom. I started laughing and inside my head I’m saying: “You gotta be fucking kidding me.”
I walked up to the glass case they were in and was immediately greeted by a fuzzy little girl-kitten who marched right up to the glass and boldly said: “Hi! My name is Susie. Who are you?” So cute. She was mostly gray with white and orange markings.
Then I saw a white one with 2 orange dots on his head. My heart jumped and then plummeted. A note on the glass case said that kitten was already spoken for by Kerri. I inquired with the saleswoman if this kerri person was really serious about taking him or if she was an 8-year old with high hopes mom would say yes. She confirmed that she was serious and coming back in an hour or so to pick him up.
The third kitten sleeping on top of a blanket was also mostly gray with white and orange markings. The fourth kitten was all wrapped up in a blanket so all I could see was that cute little gray face with white markings and those smokey blue eyes looking at me.
I was drawn back to Susie and her wonderful, bold energy. I started reevaluating the picture Fluffy had sent. Perhaps I was taking it too literally. After all, there were kittens just freshly dropped off and white was a color they all shared.
I asked the saleswoman if I could play with Susie. I sat down on the floor with this little being. She was fantastic. Playful, fun, charming. But then the picture drifted back into my minds eye again. A white cat with only a few dark spots.
I went back to the glass case and looked at the remaining three kittens again. And then I felt it. An energetic push to reach for the scruff on the back of the neck of the kitten wrapped up in the blanket who was looking at me with those smokey blue eyes.
I gently pulled him out. So tiny. He was white with 5 dark gray spots. Fluffy, you darling little shit……thank you.
Jane F. Meinz, M.A.
Women’s MidLife Mentor &
Kripalu Yoga Teacher
2164 230th Street
Saint Croix Falls, WI. 54024